trouble is her only friend, and he's back again

recently i've found that i don't feel anything at all. i have no feelings, no raw emotions, just a hollow numbness where my heart should be. it's like i've been eaten by a terrible blood-thirsty monster. chewed up, and swallowed down, then quickly spat back up, because he didn't want me either.

can you tell me what was ever really special about me all this time?

you gave me the eye boy, the too-friendly, goodnight eye. well i don't think i want your eye now. what do you think of that? i wonder what you would say if i told you, i wonder what you would do.

i don't know why you did that. i think we're both confused. i want him and you want her, but when we're together something strange happens between us. i don't know how, and i don't know why, but i miss you, and in my opinion, that's not a good thing.

you leaned so close to me, close enough i could feel your breath on my cheek when you spoke.

i need to quit you and your blue eyes. i need to stop thinking about the look you gave me last night and the butterflies it caused inside of me. because no matter how sweet or charming or caring you are, she's more important to me.

maybe i only like you because you treat me like i actually exist.

i liked him before i knew who he was.
i like him even more now that i do.

beautiful =)

HOLYMAGEEZ,

i'm sooo going to this movie the DAY it comes out ahahha,
i read every single book and now i just gotttta.

http://www.hollywood.com/trailer/6830024/Legend_of_the_Guardians_Trailer

!!!!!!

it takes two to whisper quietly,

why do you insist upon tempting me?

i pushed you away, i kept you back and here you are again, lying at my feet, asking for forgiveness. should i give it? i'm not so sure.

when we're together, everything's perfect, but there's always that uneasy feeling about the future. but what future, exactly? you leave without a second thought, whisking away, then reappear suddenly, as if from thin air.

i can't take it anymore, it hurts my heart too much.

"my hopes are so high, that your kiss might kill me.

so won't you kiss me, so that i die happy?"

please make up your mind and inform me of your choice.

YOUUUUU;

this is pure sex in human form right here.

TATTOO

holy eff i'm so excited for this tattoo.

this isn't exactly where the writing will be, it'll be flowing across underneath the birds and dandelion seeds.. but HOLY H, i'm stoooked.

eddie vedder

he just may be my new hero.
even moreso than bryan adams -- which is a stretch for me.

i luhh him.
to put it that way.

ummm i really just kinda want to play sims,
because that life that i made for myself is just a little bit better than my own
actually no, a lot better.
i'm friends with people i used to be friends with.
they all have happy families,
even if i'm not included as part of them
we're friends.

i want it to be that way for real.

then there's the charles/james thing.
wtf were you guys talking about?
you're really nice to me when james isn't there
and he shows up and
poof. different person

asshole.

'cept for i think i reeally just reeeally like him
dunno why.
makes me all warm and fuzzy on the inside which is weird for me
i kinda wish it didn't happen
he's a lot older than me.
then again, he always makes sure to say hi
but maybe he's just being polite.

WHO KNOWS?

don't forget about me

somewhere, somehow, some time ago..

----------
it's been too long since we've talked,
why did we stop talking anyways?
and why did you disappear?
why did you change so much?

it's not like we're that different,
i like to disappear every once in a while too;
but not for this long.
i miss our long talks about music
about your future
about my future

about our future.

we were going to do it together;
you'd be the talent and i'd be the voice.
you're a brilliant guitar player btw,
just thought you should know.

my future is over and done with.
i need to know if i'm good enough,
right
now.

i'm tired of waiting for everyone else.
i wish people would just tell the truth,
no matter how mean or harsh it was.
everything would be so much better.
no one would chase dreams that they couldn't reach,

we wouldn't build ourselves up
only to be broken down.

what kind of life is that anyway?

-----

where did you go? i need you now, please come back to me. i'll be here waiting, i won't turn away, i won't reject you. i'll be here, forever, waiting.